: How do you decide whether to use the infinitive or -ing version of a verb? Example: Three months had passed since she started to avoid me. Three months had passed since she started

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I would agree with Lauren that both constructs are equally valid from a grammatical point of view, but there are a number of other factors to bias the decision.

Character voice. People who studied latin prefer infinitives, people who work with their hands prefer gerunds.

Tense. infinitives work very well with future tense, gerunds work well with present tense.

Secondary connotations. Some words or phrases may acquire additional meaning. you may want to avoid or exploit that.

Poetry. Match or break rhythm.

Puns and forced puns.

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Adding to Lauren's excellent clarification, you could look at it from another perspective by referring to, let's say, money... and seeing where the latter could beg the question "why?" or "how?"

Three months had passed since she started to save money.

That sounds like a statement. OK, so she saved money.

Three months had passed since she started saving money.

In a very subtle way, depending on the person, the latter may seem fuzzy -- saving money how? Less shopping, more investments, less expenses, how?

Just an alternative way of looking at it, although this can be quite subjective.

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I think it's subjective. To my ear, to avoid is a series of individual events, while avoiding implies something continuous and ongoing.

"She started to avoid me" sounds like "I called her and she didn't return my call. The next day I texted her but she didn't text back. Two days later I sent her an email which she never opened."

"She started avoiding me" sounds like "I walked in the room and she immediately left, and when I followed her she left the building."

That's just my opinion; others may hear them as interchangeable. They're both right, and I think the nuance of difference is so subtle that you could use either purely depending on which one you liked the sound of.

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