: Re: How to give written advice in a way that is encouraging, not overbearing How do we write something to inspire a person which corrects the mistakes they've made until now, but without making

@Sent2472441

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The sample you've provided comes off as the classic parental/big brother lecture. Unless the young person is docile, they are likely to disengage, stop listening, argue, get up, and walk away.

If you want to ratchet down the tension and move toward a meaningful conversation, here are some suggestions:

Express your concern for the young person.
Demonstrate an understanding of their problems. Articulate the problems using neutral, non-judgemental, language. Acknowledge their feelings, using their terms.
Ask them questions to learn more about their condition, thoughts, and feelings. Ask questions that engage their problem-solving skills. Ask questions to confirm that you've understood things correctly.
Have a conversation. Give them plenty of time and silence to reflect and respond. Use silence when either of you need time to reflect on new information.
Describe the different outcomes that can come from their decisions, good and bad, but leave the choice to them.
Acknowledge that you have no control over them. Express hope that they will make good choices, and offer your support if they do. Make it clear that you cannot act against your own conscience and will not support them if the make bad choices. But again, that you have no control, and the choice is theirs.
If you speak to them in person, it is important to maintain a relaxed and positive demeanor. Be aware of your tone of voice, facial expression, and body language.

Good luck.

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