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Topic : Re: Repetitive pattern for action beats At times, my action beats feel awkward and repetitive. I seem to reuse similar action patterns. For example, "A studied/looked at/observed B" or "A smiled/grinned - selfpublishingguru.com

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My guess is that you are describing actions rather than motivations. That is, you are too removed from the character. Since Dylan seems to be our POV character, get us deeper into his mind. What is he thinking? What is he feeling? If you immerse us in the character, the telling will become showing much easier:

Dylan Lockwood twisted around in the cramped space capsule and slapped Musa on the back. “Musa, you got to relax. You’re ‘bout as calm as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.” His own stomach coiled tightly, but he couldn't let it show. Instead he forced a smile onto his face, hoping to calm his own nerves as well as his jittery partner. “Look, we practiced this a hundred times. It’s just another simulation, son.”

Or similar. The deeper we get into the character, the less you'll find those filter words (looked, studied, etc.) appearing in your writing.


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