: Why/when should character conflict happen and how do I write it? I've come to the recent conclusion that my writing lacks conflict. This problem is especially hard for me because I don't like

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conflict is always created when 2 people have a difference of opinions. There is no magical formula or "trick". It's a natural part of life and society. To be without conflict means nothing grows, nothing improves. Everything stays status quo because no one has an issue with the way things are. Conflict is easy to generate.... 2 girls like the same guy, 2 guys like the same girl. 10 people are trying to get accepted for a job that has 1 opening. Competition brings out conflict. A teenager has to choose between sneaking out to go to a friend's party or staying home as their parents instructed. Again conflict within 1 person is created. Do you choose pasta or chow mein? again an internal conflict is created. It is hard to give advice without knowing your story.

You need to think about what is the overall goal of the story. I hate watching sitcoms/tv because they lack a broad story but rather each episode is a story separate from each other (for the most part) without an ending until the producers decide to take them off air. Is your goal that the MC get's accepted into a top college? Then maybe MC struggles in a critical class needed to be accepted or they don't have enough life experiences like in the movie 21.

Conflict doesn't always mean a fight but rather a road block that hinders MC from getting to the main goal. Maybe MC wants to play basketball but is not good enough to make the team. They have to practice to be good enough. Maybe along the way in that story, they get a BF or GF who distracts them from their practicing which creates a side conflict and they have to choose between them or practice.

Get creative, think of the goal or objective of the story and then think about all the things that could prevent the MC from achieving that goal. These conflicts can still easily fit into your "no fighting" mentality. You just have to approach from a different definition of conflict.

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Good question. I say so because I too struggle with this, for similar reasons. Even as a kid I would always feel frustrated when characters would argue and, even worse, split up because of these conflicts. Why can't they just talk it out and get along? I would ask. When the tension finally got relieved, so was I.

And even now, as an adult, I find it difficult to write it.

I'll start with the second bullet - why does it happen? Here are four reasons I find helpful in generating it in my own writing:

Limited "resources" - when a resource is limited, people will argue and fight over it. Don't let yourself focus on the obvious, like limited food. Think more abstractly - limited time will cause different people to act differently ("John thought to himself, 'I only live once, I'm not gonna miss the opportunity to go on this adventure.' Jane, his girlfriend saw him go out the door and felt deserted. All she wanted was to marry him and raise a family")
Pressure & different thresholds - different people have different thresholds for certain kinds of pressures. One person might crack under pressure while the other not, thinking that the first is overreacting.
History - similar to the previous bullet, as a motivating factor for it, a characters history guides their decisions. Imagine two people sharing a prison cell, one who has been in prison a dozen times, the other for the first time. One might feel an urge to attempt escape, the other prefer to wait for the trial (which wants which? you decide...)
Finally, and this is the deeper one, people have very different viewpoints and appreciate different traits. Does your character act from their gut, by instinct, or is he more cerebral? (see here for some ideas on this: www.personalitypage.com/html/four-prefs.html) An old wizard might value taking time to work things out in his head before acting, seeing an immediate response as rash. His young female apprentice might see such behavior as boring, uninspired and instead seek more immediate action. Neither is wrong - both traits are important, some just work better in some situations. But the conflict is born from the different instincts people have.

Regarding how often it should happen - I don't have a formula. I think eventually you need to allow the conflict to drive both the growth of the characters and the progression of the story. There is no point in adding conflict for its own sake. What I've found in my writing is that whenever I add conflict, great things happen, new avenues for my plot open up (I'm a discovery writer), the characters change and grow, and I can leverage that one bit of conflict for a chapter or two without any need for more.

Finally - I think the tricky part in actually writing it is that you will usually have to choose one character as your viewpoint character for that scene, and for him/her you can describe their feelings and thoughts. The question is how to (a) show what the other side is thinking and feeling, and (b) how the viewpoint character interprets it. Does he/she understand the conflict for what it is, or are they confused, seeing only their own side?

One trick you could use that might help - write only the dialog and raw action between them, and then add the viewpoint emotions. I find that focusing on the externals first helps me focus the scene and make it feel more intense.

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