: Re: How to handle a character's failure? I've been writing fan fiction for 7+ years, in an attempt to weed out the beginner mistakes and know what works. In one of my fan fictions, the main character

@Goswami879

Vote Up Vote Down

As a reader, I would have been extremely put off by Mike's behavior. Also, since I read too much fanfiction, I would have attributed this to the author making a mistake, and stopped reading. I'll try to help.

Mike is inside an aircraft. When he hacks the aircraft, it is going to go to the place his mother was last seen, instead of the mission target. The other people inside the aircraft will notice the change in course. It would be very unlikely for the SETEV to not feature a display with GPS coordinates and waypoints. So they will notice.

These people volunteered for a high-risk mission in hostile territory, which means they're not special snowflakes. In fact, they are pretty baddass. Considering what usually happens in a zombie apocalypse, it's pretty safe to assume they have shot lots of zombies in the head, and a sizable amount of non-zombie looters and such. They've seen people lose it, they've sacrificed someone to the zombie horde because they don't run fast enough. Also the lives of a lot of people depend on the mission.

Thus, Mike gets bullets shot into his kneecaps until he un-hacks the aircraft, then he gets thrown out of the airlock, and becomes a red stain on the ground. Any other outcome would break suspension of disbelief.

Suggested fix:

While going to the destination with the SETEV, they spot a chopper, or maybe another SETEV, parked on top of a high-rise building, or in the middle of a field, whatever. Mike immediately tries to convince the others to land there, because he sees the other aircraft as an opportunity to rescue his mom while not having to steal the SETEV and kill the rest of the team.

The other people will argue that it would be better to fly the newly discovered aircraft back to base, because it is a valuable resource. But they already have quite a few, so it isn't a resource worth dying for. So, when Mike pulls out his gun, they will decide that having a gunfight inside a flying aircraft isn't worth it, and drop Mike close to the aircraft.

This allows Mike to return to base with his mom and an aircraft, which is a prize of enough value that he might not be shot for treason.

(0)

Login to post a comment!