: Re: Why does using this "-ing" verb construction make my writing weaker? I had to write a scholarship essay, wherein I wrote this sentence: Over the ensuing years I read as much as I could,

I think I would've written the same thing you did. As I re-read your version several times, I began to feel that there's a jump after the comma. To try to see it more clearly, I distilled the two versions down:

"I read ... trying to..." versus
"I read... in order to...".

And it does feel like a bit of a mismatch in the original version. I'n not an expert and can't say much beyond that, but I can sense their point.

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@Goswami879

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: Is there a way of listing the elements that makes a real fact fun? For instance I wrote this thing that is real Godâ€™s love is like your parents love / except for the â€˜â€˜burning,

@Goswami879

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: How can I improve this description which includes actions? This is the beginning of a short story I'm writing (I'm not a native English speaker): I was lying in the dark, looking at

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: I am interested in this in large part because it has not been done. Has anyone thought of a story like this? Actually, it has been done. A LOT of times. Classic fantasy example: R. Zelazny,

: Re: Why does using this "-ing" verb construction make my writing weaker? I had to write a scholarship essay, wherein I wrote this sentence: Over the ensuing years I read as much as I could,

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: Is there a way of listing the elements that makes a real fact fun? For instance I wrote this thing that is real Godâ€™s love is like your parents love / except for the â€˜â€˜burning,

: How can I improve this description which includes actions? This is the beginning of a short story I'm writing (I'm not a native English speaker): I was lying in the dark, looking at

: I am interested in this in large part because it has not been done. Has anyone thought of a story like this? Actually, it has been done. A LOT of times. Classic fantasy example: R. Zelazny,

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