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Topic : Re: Why does using this "-ing" verb construction make my writing weaker? I had to write a scholarship essay, wherein I wrote this sentence: Over the ensuing years I read as much as I could, - selfpublishingguru.com

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Part of the problem comes from the fact that you have "ensuing" followed by "trying" — which makes the sentence sing-songy and metrically weak.

But as it stands the sentence is wordy and therefore weak. Certainly you could improve it by dropping the "trying" altogether:

Over the ensuing years I read as much as I could, to increase my knowledge and understanding of my own language.

Let's try to hack off a few more words:

After that I read as much as I could, to increase my knowledge and understanding of my own language.

But we can still do better:

After that, to improve my skill in English, I read a great deal.

You'll notice I substituted "English" for "my own language"; if your own language is not English, substitute whatever language applies.


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