: The pacing of the writing must match the pacing of the scene. For a love scene, you need avid and languorous description. In an action scene, you need short, almost breathless wording.

@Welton431

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The pacing of the writing must match the pacing of the scene. For a love scene, you need avid and languorous description. In an action scene, you need short, almost breathless wording. Here's how I would re-write Nick's example:

James ran down the hill. The enemy were in this valley, somewhere. Where, dammit? He flicked his rifle, left, right, left again. Noise and smoke and dense forest made it hard to see. Shots rang out. Two men beside him dropped, crying and streaming blood.
His yell "Medic!" was drowned by the sudden buzzing overhead. Everything went white.

See? Short sentences, mostly monosyllabic and disyllabic words. If this were a movie, they'd use very short shots, lots of close-up and obstructed views. Try for the same effect with words.

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