: Re: How to make stock death speech great again? So, Character d is dying, he got shot in the side with a Pulse Rifle. This is very bad, as Pulse Rifles are in the laser category and

Make it poignant. Unless the character is extremely versed in the technical aspects of the human body, it's likely that he won't focus on that aspect. Consider the first Iron Man film, where the character Yinsed dies in the course of a firefight and is able to live long enough to give Tony his dying words. No one mocks this scene because it is quite poignant. Up to this point, Yinsed's motivation for helping Tony was give as escaping so he can return to his family. When Tony tries to remind Yinsed of that, we learn that this wasn't Yinsed's true goal... not entirely.

During their earlier discussion, Yinsed takes pity on Tony when Tony explains he has no family to return to, saying that Tony is a man "who has everything, yet nothing." Naturally, this is an important value to Yinsed and Tony comes to believe that Yinsed is allying with Tony because it's his only way to reunite with his family. But in this scene we learn that it wasn't Yinsed's only goal. Yinsed's family was dead and Yinsed's "reuniting" with his family is in the afterlife. It's here we learn the true goal: As a devout family man, Yinsed had no will to live knowing that his family no longer existed. They were his purpose in life. In Tony, he saw a man who had not found a purpose to be robbed of. Yinsed's true goal is to free Tony because he can sense that despite this lack of purpose, Tony is still a good man.

This scene will inform everything Tony does in this movie and in the future movies to follow featuring him. His protective nature of his legacy, his altruism, his guilt over preprieved failures, his building of and (subsequent fear of losing) a family in the form of the Avengers, these all stem from the dying words of Yinsed.

Dying dialog can have specific meaning and willing suspension of disbelief will forgive the important messages... but they need to do something more for the readers than confirm the obvious.

Load Full (0)

: How to complement a novel with short stories - what to avoid I have given my novel to beta readers now. hurray! I'm also very pointedly not looking at it for a few weeks. I'm spending these

@LarsenBagley300

Load Full 2 Comments

: How does one gauge the strength of any particular adverb? I am now editing for adverbs, as silly as that may sound to some people. :-) I have learned, 'by ear', that the advice to 'avoid

@LarsenBagley300

Load Full 2 Comments

: I generally agree with @Secespitus and that may be all the answer you need to consider. However the idea of sexuality as a weapon is an interesting one, and could potentially be done well

@LarsenBagley300

Load Full 0 Comments

: Do too many scenes exhaust the reader? I'm now analyzing the scenes in my manuscript. I broke my manuscript into scenes using the definition that a new scene begins when a person, place,

: Re: How to make stock death speech great again? So, Character d is dying, he got shot in the side with a Pulse Rifle. This is very bad, as Pulse Rifles are in the laser category and

More posts by @LarsenBagley300

: How to complement a novel with short stories - what to avoid I have given my novel to beta readers now. hurray! I'm also very pointedly not looking at it for a few weeks. I'm spending these

: How does one gauge the strength of any particular adverb? I am now editing for adverbs, as silly as that may sound to some people. :-) I have learned, 'by ear', that the advice to 'avoid

: I generally agree with @Secespitus and that may be all the answer you need to consider. However the idea of sexuality as a weapon is an interesting one, and could potentially be done well

: Do too many scenes exhaust the reader? I'm now analyzing the scenes in my manuscript. I broke my manuscript into scenes using the definition that a new scene begins when a person, place,

Login to post a comment!

0 Comments

Back to top