: Re: Pitfalls of writing a main character of different gender to the author, specifically first-person perspective? This is my first question on here, so bear with me, if you will. My question is

@Reiling826

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I think this is going to depend on the author. Women write male MCs all the time, and I can think of several successful male author/female characters to add to your list: Michael Cunningham in The Hours, Flaubert's Madame Bovary and her friend Anna Karenina by Tolstoy, Thackerey's Vanity Fair, etc. Although I also think there's a significant subjectivity to our judgement of the portrayals: the first time I read both Madame Bovary AND Anna Karenina, I was frustrated by the female characters and tempted to write them off as unrealistic - the next time I read them, I changed my mind!

So, I disagree with the idea that men, as a whole, cannot write female characters well. But I have certainly read some messes in which men did NOT write female characters well. I would also disagree with the idea that you should "play it safe and write how you would for a dude." I don't think we need to get into a nature/nurture debate to establish that women currently alive, and, I believe, alive at any time or place ever, have a very different life experience than men. Pretending that these differences don't exist will lead to shallow, unrealistic characterization, in my experience.

Leaving female authors out of it, I think every male writer looking at a female character needs to ask himself whether he understands her. What are her general life experiences, sure, but also what are the experiences that she's had as a woman? When she was a little girl, was she dressed up frilly, or was she a tomboy? Was it her choice, or her parents'? Did she feel guilty the first time she had sex? Has she ever been called a slut, and how did that make her feel? How does she dress now? When's the first time she was sexually harassed, and how did she react? When's the most RECENT time she was sexually harassed, and how did she react THAT time? Has she ever been pregnant? Ever had a pregnancy scare? Ever had an abortion? How did she feel about that? etc. etc. ETC. There are a LOT of differences between male and female characters.

If you feel like you have good answers for all these questions, maybe you're ready to start writing a female character. If you don't have the answers, though, I wouldn't say you need to despair of ever writing about half of the human population! Just do some reading, some thinking, some talking to female friends, and see if you can develop the ability to put yourself in a woman's place; it'll make you a better writer, and probably a better human being, too!

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