: Re: "All of a sudden..." ? I am writing a manuscript for a novel. It's my first attempt, and often I find myself wanting to write "suddenly" or "all of a sudden". I do this when I want
I think this is one of those areas where the 'show don't tell' rule really shines.
Instead of:
Bart sat back in his chair and let himself relax. All of a sudden,
there was a huge explosion down the street.
Try:
Bart sat back in his chair and let himself relax. He was almost
asleep when something made him open his eyes. There was just enough
time for him to roll off his chair and desperately flatten himself against the
ground. The cloud of debris had swept over him before he even heard
the explosion. He kept his head low, his hands shielding his neck,
and tried to understand what was happening. etc.
I'd also suggest short sentences and paragraphs (I didn't do that in my example, but if I were writing this in MS format, I'd definitely consider putting a paragraph break after the second sentence). You may want to go so far as using short, sharp words.
More posts by @Hamaas631
: How to create space Recently, a few snippets of my fiction have received critiques along the lines of 'Does not give a sense of space'. Or 'needs more description, sights and sounds'. I think
: Please advise on this comma among semi-colons and provide a more concise sentence I created this question for two reasons: I want to know if it is proper to place a comma after the word
Terms of Use Privacy policy Contact About Cancellation policy © selfpublishingguru.com2024 All Rights reserved.