: Re: Does detail obscure or enhance action? I have two versions of a pivotal scene in my novel (both already written). My SP is a rather impulsive young woman who is learning to be a bit less

@Rambettina586

Assuming she survives (or in some cases even if she doesn't depending on how the story is structured) don't forget that you can always do the short version (which I agree with the others would most likely work better for an action scene) but then weave the other details in retrospectively.

For example perhaps she's in hospital afterwards talking about that moment and the thoughts that flashed through her mind in that instant. Or you could be more subtle and weave in references to it in multiple later scenes.

Storytelling doesn't have to be as linear as some people make it.

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