: Re: How to write a nice frame challenge? When answering questions on Stack Exchange, some of us challenge the assumptions of the author. These frame challenges can often be quite popular answers.

@Sent2472441

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Along with balancing positive and negative feedback, it's helpful to stick to 'I' responses, rather than 'You should do X' type responses.

I try to frame my responses using my own experiences as references. So I'll say, when I was in this situation, I did XYZ which resulted in ABC, which was helpful to me because of blah blah blah.

The OP is less likely to feel criticised and can take or leave the response depending on whether they feel their circumstances are similar. They can think, well that wouldn't work for me because of XYZ, but I can see why it worked for you.

But it's easy to forget yourself at times, especially when responding to something you're passionate about. And words are blunt instruments when they aren't accompanied by tone and NVC. Which is why you should be even more cautious, even more courteous and polite, when writing anonymously on the internet. It's an arena where people are far more bullish than they would dare to be face-to-face.

EDIT:

Reading @jpmc26 comments, I realised I’d made an assumption in my answer, responding according to my personal field. To clarify:

If you are writing a frame challenge in a field where there are right and wrong answers, you are on more stable ground, but personally, I would still word responses courteously pointing them to research and asking if they have considered XYZ or read ABC.

However, if you’re in the writing arena, particularly creative writing, there are seldom right and wrong answers. What works for one writer won’t necessarily work for another and being bullish with ‘You should do X, you should do Y’ type responses is generally considered very poor form. So much so, that in some of the groups I belong to, packed to the rafters with tens of thousands of writers, it’s actually against the rules to post in that way. Telling someone what will work for them, as opposed to sticking to what worked for you, is considered prescriptivism.

So, the above response does depend on the field, I have a creative writing bias. Also, the OP is clearly sensitive to how bullish frame challenges can be and the whole point is to find an alternative way of responding to them.

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