: Re: How can I make this formal paragraph more exciting, engaging and friendly? Text: "Your order has been received. A digital proof of your personalized item will be sent to you via Etsy Conversation

You are asking the members of the forum to do the work that you should be doing. This forum is dedicated to helping you learn to be a better writer. If you had provided some alternative language and asked a specific question about it (for example, which option gives a better result in exciting the reader), we might be able to answer it. But I did not see anything resembling such as question.

Here is what I would like to see in a question:

This is what I am trying to accomplish (theme, intent)
This is what I have tried (hopefully more than one thing)
This is the problem or deficiency as I see it (more than "it is
wrong")
This is the criteria that I will use to judge the answer (more
objective than subjective)

Please edit your question to provide the information that we need to answer it.

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: Re: How can I make this formal paragraph more exciting, engaging and friendly? Text: "Your order has been received. A digital proof of your personalized item will be sent to you via Etsy Conversation

More posts by @Correia211

: How do I make my plot more interesting? This is gonna be long before I ask the question itself. Here is a quick overview of my plot: In the fictional world named Slavaz, there is a great

: Sentence Variety Writers always talk about the importance of sentence variety in writing, but they never say which sentence type one should use for a specific scenario. So when do I use simple,

: Looking for a better word than "Yikes" I'm trying to find the right word to use in a (serious) comic I'm writing. The character is an eighteen year old American girl, talking to some older

: How can I indicate time passing? There is a scene in which my main character is hiding from the villain while they are both in the same room. I want this to be a suspenseful and agonizing

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