: Re: Paragraph flow, verb inversion and last sentence tone The paragraph below is a conclusion for an essay. I have three problems with the paragraph that I would like to review with you. This

@Angie602

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To help with the tone, consider using shorter, more concise sentences.

To gain punch, you can simplify your sentence structures,eliminate some abstract words ("exacerbates", "denial"), and put your key words at the end of each sentence.

To gain force at the end, you might consier reoranizing the last sentence to connect tightly the causes and effects.

An example:

Ignoring a conflict often makes it worse. When I ignored some bullies, they increased their bullying. Eventually they stopped, but only after I confronted them. Telling them to stop was not easy. I needed to overcome my fear of being hurt, and I had to work hard to understand my own nature. Having done both, the gain in courage was worth it.

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