: Re: "Lacking meat", "Content-free", and poor defense-development. Please critique my work After releasing my first blogging article I received some less-than-stellar reviews citing that I "managed
The paragraph starting "Recently" is where you go vegetarian. You set up your pitch in the first three paras, state your premise in the fourth, play a little devil's advocate in the fifth... and then trail off.
You've removed the status quo, but you haven't replaced it with anything. Yes, commercials exist; yes, they generally bore the viewer; yes, they exist so companies can sell products. You've defined the problem and the reason for the problem. Now you have to present alternatives.
If the problems are "Creating TV ain't free" and "advertisements in the middle of TV shows are boring and disruptive," then you must provide other solutions. What about cable TV? what about streaming TV? what about product placement? what's an entirely different model we haven't seen yet?
Separately, I don't mind the "Okay, I know what you're thinking," because the article is clearly chatty and informal in tone, and it works with that.
More posts by @Carla500
: Where to find authors for highly technical articles? I've looked at some of the largest outsourcing sites. These have huge amounts of software developers, and huge amounts of casual writers.
: Is there a name for this kind of sentence structure? I've seen this construction quite a bit, although only in the last five years or so. It's a transcription of a way of speaking, where
Terms of Use Privacy policy Contact About Cancellation policy © selfpublishingguru.com2024 All Rights reserved.