: Re: Where should I put a minor action within a piece of dialogue? Which is more appropriate: The air carried a bitter chill, but was clear and unpolluted. “Oh wow,” I said. “I

@Tiffany377

Vote Up Vote Down

I agree that the answer is "it depends." I personally would write:

My mother squeezed my shoulder. "That's why we don't usually go shopping on Black Friday, honey, but I think we can make an exception this time."

In my view, if Mum is squeezing my shoulder, it goes without saying that the sentence following within the quotation marks is her reply. But then again, I'm making the supposition that you'll have a fair bit of speech in your story and will be looking for ways to stop saying "said" and "replied" repeatedly. If there's some show after the tell, your first example is just fine - as is the second!

(0)

Login to post a comment!