: You sound like you're trying to seduce them -- all you want to know is whether they have availability for a booking of their facility. Honestly, if I got an email like that I'd say "No"

You sound like you're trying to seduce them -- all you want to know is whether they have availability for a booking of their facility.

Honestly, if I got an email like that I'd say "No" just based on my assessment that you're trying to be my best friend, not engage in a business transaction.

Dear Sir,

I represent ...., and we are looking for a venue for an event in [insert time period]. We would need the following facilities:

...

Can you please confirm what availability you have in this period that would be suitable, and a rate guide.

Regards, ...

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: You sound like you're trying to seduce them -- all you want to know is whether they have availability for a booking of their facility. Honestly, if I got an email like that I'd say "No"

More posts by @Smith147

: Is the following extended metaphor/group of metaphors too overwhelming? I bought a box of sushi, and sat at the round table beside me. Opening the plastic container made me feel as

: "No longer knowing" vs "without knowing...anymore." I think this is a common problem I have. I always find myself debating whether I should write a sentence as "no longer knowing" or "without

: Rewriting an existing story (fable) to fit it within my fantasy universe My antagonist sends my protagonist a note that says "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil". Obviously, this is the

: Will my readers find it hard to care/identify with a character who seems to lack human emotions? I'm writing my first novel. One of the main characters was born without a soul. This is her

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