: Re: Need A Way To Avoid Excessive Use Of Subject When Refering To Character I'm writing a short story, and need to avoid excessive use of a subject. Using he, his, or the man will get very repetitive

@Martha805

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I've found a happy medium in referencing the name of the character, or in this case "the man", about every 3-4 uses of the pronoun, which ends up being about once a paragraph.

However, your writing tends to unexpectedly switch between third and first person and I don't quite feel like I'm understanding parts of your writing so I apologise if I get some parts wrong, but here is how I would rework it.

What an odd and wonderful day to be sitting on a bench, the man thinks, holding a peach in one hand and a spoon in the other. He wipes off some fuzz as it begins to drizzle and feels the fur of the peach, chemicals and all. At his feet lies a puddle reflecting a face with a moustache, bushy brows and a peanut sized nose.

Biting down on the peach, it reveals itself as wetter than a bad snog and his pants dutifully become a sponge for the juice. He jumps up in realisation of what has transpired and reaches into his coat pocket with the peach still held in his mouth. Out comes a handkerchief; its prior history going unnoticed as he lets out a sigh of frustration. All the while his pants are collecting more of the sweet juice from the peach, now dripping from his chin.

The man expresses a daft look as a woman walks past and cringes slightly at the sight of his clumsy situation.

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