: Re: Is the word "becoming" being used correctly in the following metaphor? We kept going until we reached a door. Finally! The corridor was deeper than I thought, like a tunnel. Or the bottom

I think a better way is just to go straight for the metaphor without any helper verb. Here it is with a few other modifications to streamline the prose:

The corridor was deeper than I thought, as dim and hazy as the bottom of the sea. Whole reefs of shelves and scrolls kept the light from flooding in.

This introduces the sea metaphor at the end of the first sentence (first as a simile, to let the readers get their feet wet, so to speak), and extends it wholesale in the second.

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: Re: Is the word "becoming" being used correctly in the following metaphor? We kept going until we reached a door. Finally! The corridor was deeper than I thought, like a tunnel. Or the bottom

More posts by @Murray165

: Should quotation marks for titles of short works be included as part of link text? In a hypertext document, when the title of a short work (which is enclosed in quotation marks) is a link

: How does one become lucid in Copywriting? I am an Advertising Undergrad and wish to become a copywriter. My writing skills are above average but I can't seem to regularly create the same quality

: Writing techniques or exercises to improve ability to show rather than tell? Does anyone have any effective writing techniques or exercises that you use to help you focus more on showing the

: Should I "spanglish" a Mexican character's dialogue? I am working on a novel based in Mexico, and I am wondering if there are any strong opinions on whether or not I should put common phrases

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