: What to do with cliched metaphors? Example from my own writing: "Please take care of yourself," she replied. "Health is the most important thing in life, remember that." "I know,

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If you use a canned phrase or a well-known simile, such as "like speaking different languages", then you're evoking for a reader a situation that they are familiar with, and appealing to their own understanding of such situations that they've described (or seen described) in those terms.

It's not always a bad thing, but it's also not putting any novel ideas in the mouth of your narrator. In effect it's routine presentation of information about the scene and his reaction to it. If that's what you want to do, then do it, but if it's not what you want to do then do something different. Don't try to do the same routine thing in unexpected language.

Tweaking the known phrase by substituting "dialect" for "language" does nothing for you. At best the reader doesn't notice, at worst they wonder why you didn't just say the usual thing. Since there's no good reason, it's just less of an exaggeration if taken literally, they conclude that you're stretching your vocabulary to no purpose.

Changing the metaphor allows your narrator to express a different, and less familiar, thought. OK, so shouting from different shores isn't completely original either, but if what you want is to present a different perspective on a well-known situation (in this case one of failure to communicate and by extension failure to connect) then there's no shortcut to it, you have to actually come up with a fresh thought on the subject!

If you just want to communicate the facts on the ground, but you feel that the usual idiom is clichéed, then go more literal rather than reaching for a different metaphor: "It felt as if she could never understand me".

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Alexander:
I think you don't like the phrase because it doesn't really fit the situation. Your two characters aren't having a problem understanding each other, which is what the mental image of two people speaking different languages conjures; their problem is a stubborn unwillingness to cede to the other opinion.

I draw from my personal experience with my father when I offer you this version:
I sometimes feel we're stuck in an endless debate, with no arbiter to declare a winner.

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I struggle with this as well and have two approaches the help get out of the rut of tired language:

Take the advice the Lauren Ipsum discussed earlier. It works very well.
Cut out tired language, describe what's happening without flair and without requirement for catchy phrasing, and let the strength of the story telling come from the directness of your narrative. Solid narrative voices almost necessarily have a unique perspective that draw people in and therefore could be more powerful for the reader than the original tired language.

If it doesn't feel right, cut it out or rewrite it. It's your voice that your audience wants to read anyway, not a collection of rehashed phrases.

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I had a poetry teacher who talked about "tired language," referring to clichés like this.

Take your original metaphor apart and break it down to the real, concrete, non-representative ideas. Are Eri and Mom so far apart that not one single thought is shared between them? Are they speaking as though they are watching two different TV shows, or experienced two different days at work? Are they looking at a house from in the sun and in the shade? Is the dress white and gold or blue and black? and so on.

Once you get to the genuine thought, you can construct a new phrase or metaphor to express it.

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Creating original similes and metaphors is incredibly difficult. When teaching students I find that similes are easier than metaphors. It is possible to write similes and then convert them to metaphors.

One way to write similes is to think of an object. Think of a characteristic it has in common with your original object and then try to write a simile. For example, if the original object is an apple and the object you want to compare it with is a CD you might want to focus on the way it shines. The result: The apple was so shiny it reflected the light like a CD in the sunshine. (I just made this up as I was writing, but the principle holds.)

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See if you can add a twist. One time Harlan Ellison wrote:

She looked like a million bucks.

Realizing what a horrible cliche that was, he changed it:

She looked like a million bucks, tax free.

For a lame example (that twists the cliche by adding another one):

It sometimes felt as if we spoke different languages. British English and American English.

ETA: This idea is useful sometimes. Lauren Ipsum's idea is useful all the time. Y'all should go upvote that one.

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Depending on the style of what you're writing, sometimes it can be good to highlight the cliché. Maybe pointing out the cliché of what she is saying "Mother that's such a cliché" then ending with "I guess its my turn for clichés then" (that's awful! but you get the point hopefully)

Or move the cliché into her speech, and then end with " she sometimes spoke in clichés, but her intentions were good, and maybe we do speak in different languages..."

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