Great question,

I think it's about your personal preference, really.

Surely you don't really need to italicised your dialogue unless of course you're using them to empathise the point on your speech with a sharper tone.

I personally would rather avoid them entirely in dialogues.

See,

"Shut up!" she yelled.

You'd already indicate that she's stressing her words by adding exclamation point while explaining what the subject(she)is doing(yells). Perhaps you could go by adding some descriptive behaviour on the way that she yells. Frantically? With exasperation?

As for,

"I said there were three people missing. Can't you ever listen?"

Perhaps you could use some method like this.

"I said there were three people missing. Can't you ever listen?" Jake explained once more, empathised on the word 'three'.

or something like

"I said there were 'three' people missing. Can't you ever listen?"

Notice that I'd added apostrophe on the word 'three' to sharpen the tone.

It is all about what you feel most comfortable with. Some writers would use italicise words to indicate a character's thought. Some uses them to manipulate the tones of a character. And some uses them to clarify their point, like a missing joke that a reader could potentially miss. Just be mindful with it.

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