: Re: How to write a character misinterpreting Four Candles as Fork Handles English is full of homophones that can cause confusion when speaking, but if the two similar sounding words are spelled differently

@Sarah872

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Be minimalist, and write what an outside observer would hear.
It's worth noting that even in the Fork 'Andles sketch, Ronnie B. is saying very little. He's not having a long conversation that would help us get a handle on his accent; he's just grunting the things he needs.
Telling this from Ronnie C's perspective, you wouldn't even allow for the possibility of mishearing until later in the text. Something like:

He unfolded a grubby piece of paper and squinted at it.
"Fou' candles," he said in a rough workers accent.
"Four candles?" I confirmed, turning to gather the requested items. I set the candles on the counter and said "There you are. Four candles.
The man just stared at them.
"Nah, fou' candles. 'Andles fer forks."
Fork handles he meant. Stupid blighter.

Later, with the man's accent more firmly fixed, we can play with it.

"Got any ose?"
Ose? I took a moment to parse that through his silly accent, with its dropped aitches, added in the fork handles, and realised what he meant. Hoes.
Gardening tools were on the other side of the shop. I set a fine hoe down in front of him, and he gave it a blank stare.
"No, ose."
"Oh, hose! I thought you meant hoes. Y'mean hose y' should've said that..."
I collected a reel of garden hose and dropped it in front of him.
"No, ose."
It was my turn to stare blankly. "Well what do...oh, you mean hose, panty hose!" Luckily we did have a pack of tights nearby. I grabbed it and brought it.
"No, ose, ose. O's for the gate, mon repose. Le'er O's."

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