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Topic : Re: How to describe a kiss between the protagonists in third person? I'm writing in third person because I want to express the standpoint of both of my characters. Everything's running smoothly except - selfpublishingguru.com

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Some good answers. Let me add one more thought:

Is it necessary to describe the feelings of both characters? Even aside from Mark Baker's comment that it may not be necessary to describe the feelings of either, even if you want or need to describe the feelings, would one person's point of view be sufficient to get the message across?

If their feelings are radically different, then yes, it's necessary. It reminds me of an article I read years ago where a man related how his wife once told him that while they were dating, she once made a comment to him that began, "You know, we've been dating for six months now and ..." And then suddenly she panicked, thinking that he would take this as her pressuring him to make a commitment. When she got home she called her mother to discuss the conversation; she talked about it to all her girlfriends. And so, she wondered years later, did he remember the conversation and what was he thinking? He said he did remember it quite well. And what he was thinking at the time was, "Have we really been dating for six months? Because I'm pretty sure I haven't changed the oil since we started dating."

My point being: If their thoughts are similar, if they've both been waiting anxiously for this moment, etc, then describing the feelings of one of them should be plenty. Only if they're seriously different do you need to describe both.

Also, this is a case where you could likely solve the problem by simply having them each say what they're feeling rather than going inside their heads. "Oh George, I've been waiting so long for this moment," she said. "All this time I thought you weren't interested," he replied. Etc.


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