: Re: Ways to replace "Then, ..." I find myself writing "Then, ..." a lot. Example: As soon as she found my letter---or rather, Kiyoshi's---she widened her slitted eyes and pressed the letter

"Then" is not really required in the examples you show. "Then" is only really required when the previous sentence or clause indicates further actions or items.

"First, the Earth cooled, then the dinosaurs came."

I also suspect you are looking at sentences to tell your story rather than complete paragraphs. Your examples can easily be re-written to avoid "then".

"After setting down his chef hat on the counter Mr. HSC squinted his slanted eyes at me. â€œLook my shiftâ€™s over, he said. "How â€˜bout we go to the izakaya around the corner?""

"As soon as she found my letter---or rather, Kiyoshi's---she widened her slitted eyes and pressed the letter against her chest. She opened the envelope as though handling a delicate glass sculpture."

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: Re: Ways to replace "Then, ..." I find myself writing "Then, ..." a lot. Example: As soon as she found my letter---or rather, Kiyoshi's---she widened her slitted eyes and pressed the letter

More posts by @Margaret427

: Can you write a story using inanimate characters? It seems a simple enough question,

: Is "How to" killing creative writing? There is nothing particularity creative about following a set of instructions on how to write a novel. It is perhaps even less 'creative' to base styles

: How do I blur the line between dream and reality? I intend to write a science fantasy where dream world plays as important role as reality. The dream world stated has quite a distinct feel

: What's it called? As a novelist my preference is for what I call an 'active narrator'. The terminology confuses most as they think I'm talking about sentence construction and the benefits of

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