: Re: Does this microfiction provide a slightly surreal sense when describing an ordinary scene? In this short story I'm trying to describe an unexceptional scene in an exciting and compelling way.

First, I would break it up into more paragraphs. That enhances readability.

Second, using the adverb abstract is strange, but you do not gain surrealism doing so. You kicked me out of the story before I reached the first full stop (period, if you are an American).

Talking about the story: There is none! justkt pointed that out already.

Overusing adjectives/adverbs will bring you nowhere. If you want it to be surreal, describe the scene from an LSD viewpoint (yeah, the drug).

Assuming the protagonist has a terrible headache and needs to go to the bathroom fetching some aspirin, you could write: "He was walking through honey and it sounded pink." Well, I wouldn't use pink, but you get the idea.

Load Full (0)

: What's a good title to a presentations' table of contents? This is a professional presentation, I'm looking for a good title for the ToC page (some humor allowed). What I have so far is "What

@Frith254

Load Full 9 Comments

: In defense of laptops (specifically netbooks) : I think a pretty decent choice would be a netbook that is underpowered enough to keep you from using it for anything but word processing, and

@Frith254

Load Full 0 Comments

: One Monkey and Shan are right, that there are tons of novels/movies where entities like the CIA are the bad guys. Unlikely that someone will sue you, or even can. Right of free expression

@Frith254

Load Full 0 Comments

: I think this is better suited for EL&U, but if you say this is a spin-off (you haven't provided the link), I'm fine with that. As far as I can say, there is nothing wrong with your

: Re: Does this microfiction provide a slightly surreal sense when describing an ordinary scene? In this short story I'm trying to describe an unexceptional scene in an exciting and compelling way.

More posts by @Frith254

: What's a good title to a presentations' table of contents? This is a professional presentation, I'm looking for a good title for the ToC page (some humor allowed). What I have so far is "What

: In defense of laptops (specifically netbooks) : I think a pretty decent choice would be a netbook that is underpowered enough to keep you from using it for anything but word processing, and

: One Monkey and Shan are right, that there are tons of novels/movies where entities like the CIA are the bad guys. Unlikely that someone will sue you, or even can. Right of free expression

: I think this is better suited for EL&U, but if you say this is a spin-off (you haven't provided the link), I'm fine with that. As far as I can say, there is nothing wrong with your

Login to post a comment!

0 Comments

Back to top