: Problematic writing I'm currently attempting to write a story. And In the past I have tried but found myself unhappy with the result because I find that I use "I" in every sentence. For example:

Reframe and combine.

The wooden floor was frigid, it’s always seems to be cold. I can barely afford heat without Max here. I try to save the heat the best I can, I don’t know how long it might be before I can pay for it again. Cautiously floor groaned as I slowly progressed down the seemingly endless hall to the kitchen, pictures of our wedding rested on the walls.

You have two sentences that talk about the floor. Whenever there is more than one sentence talking about something, combining them can be better.

So here's my who reframe, then we will go piece by piece as to why and how:

The frigid wooden floor groaned as I slowly padded down the hall, with
Max's face smiling at me from our wedding pictures on the walls. His
absence brought the cold. Two can live as cheaply as one, they say, but
one--one can't always pay the bills. So down the thermostat
went, and every step around the house nowadays seared the toes with cold, even through woolen
socks.

Same ideas, generally. If you can take out passive words, do. That can help. "The floor was frigid" can be reduced. You're just describing the floor. And it's actually doing something in the next sentence that talks about the floor (groaning) so you can put those together. Not all the time, but if you're talking about the same thing twice, always consider it in editing. This quote is in isolation, but, I took that first sentence and made sure we introduced who Max was rather than just a name who pays the bills. It keeps the focus on Max the entire time.

Next this bit:

I can barely afford heat without Max here. I try to save the heat the best I can, I don’t know how long it might be before I can pay for it again.

Your goal is to take out "I." Whenever you are editing, one of the goals is not to be repetitious in your writing UNLESS it serves a purpose. So what I did here is to say to myself, let's ask not what the protagonist is doing but what Max is doing. Because these sentences aren't actually about the protagonist--they are about Max's effect on the environment and the protagonist.

So here's what you do when you are editing those "I's" out.
1) Ask what ELSE or who else it's about. In SHORT. Like three words max. I thought about it, and came up with "Max's absence"
2) Summarize the section with the I's with one sentence, and try to use an action verb when you do it. So since I had already introduced Max--that became "His absence brought the cold."

And it becomes this:

His
absence brought the cold. Two can live as cheaply as one, they say, but
one--one can't always pay the bills. So down the thermostat
went, and every step around the house nowadays seared the toes with cold, even through woolen
socks.

If you're asking about how to simply write this way, and the answer is you won't. Not on the first draft. Writing can often be re-writing. Get the general ideas out and don't worry so much about the execution, because you can go back and accomplish what you want to in edits. Eventually, these rewrites might train you to write more like this on your first draft, but that's a while yet to come.

Just out of curiosity, where are you from that the heating bill is separate from electric? I suppose it could run on gas rather than electric. My grandmother's house out in the country was like that. You'd have to have the gas man out for the heating and pay for the propane.

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