: Re: Am I breaking the "show don't tell" rule in the following passage? Then, as if sensing my presence, the girl turned around. She looked young. Probably sixteen or seventeen. She had long

Rules are there to be broken, and here you break this rule masterfully.

Yes, that is "telly", but being surrounded by entirely "showy" parts, assuring the reader that you were diligent with the descriptions, you suddenly discard the looks and throw the impression instead; it's jarring - as it should be. It draws the reader's focus, marks the information as especially important, contrasting it with the generic description surrounding it, making that part stand out by just making it sink through telling that to us directly, overshadowing the importance of normal appearance.

Leave as is. Yes, you broke the rule, and you did right.

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: Writing, my first attempt I would like to undertake a project and write a novel, but I'm not sure how should I start. I have the idea, I just don't know the best way to write it down.

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: National Novel Writing Month began in 1999 as a daunting but straightforward challenge: to write 50,000 words of a novel in 30 days. Now, each year on November 1, hundreds of thousands of

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: Re: Am I breaking the "show don't tell" rule in the following passage? Then, as if sensing my presence, the girl turned around. She looked young. Probably sixteen or seventeen. She had long

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: Writing, my first attempt I would like to undertake a project and write a novel, but I'm not sure how should I start. I have the idea, I just don't know the best way to write it down.

: National Novel Writing Month began in 1999 as a daunting but straightforward challenge: to write 50,000 words of a novel in 30 days. Now, each year on November 1, hundreds of thousands of

: Can this statement be simplified, and is it effective? I am in no academic circles, nor have any friends who are interested in writing, so it is difficult for me to get any feedback regarding

: How to write a reminder LinkedIn email to a stranger? I emailed some people on LinkedIn asking them some questions about their expertise. Most of them responded back and asked me to send my

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