: Re: Is the following repetition unnecessary? I peered through the glass. It was a bird. At first I thought it was a crow because of its black feathers; they were so black they shone
Yes, that repetition is unnecsssary. No, you do not necessarily need to change it.
Parallel construction is a valuable tool and can make your paragraph easier to read, especially if you're including a comparison as in this narrative.
You may want to adjust your other comparisons so that they all have similar structures, but doing so is purely a stylistic choice.
On an un-related note, you should standardize your tense. You switch between past and present too quickly. ("realize" should be "realized", for instance.)
More posts by @Bryan361
: Use of "I" is perfectly acceptable in a narrative first-person memoir. Especially if it is written in either a conversational or confessional style (i.e., a diary). Quotation marks for dialog
: Referencing, but not using, trademarked characters Obviously, you're not allowed to use trademarked characters like Superman or Batman in your published works. If I wrote a novel about Superman
Terms of Use Privacy policy Contact About Cancellation policy © selfpublishingguru.com2024 All Rights reserved.